Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Passing me by.

She sat by the window scribbling in her tiny notebook with a pencil. She looked disturbed and deep in thought. Each time I passed her house I saw her in the same position. Day after day, doing the same thing. Scribbling. She always looked upset too. What a whiny head I remember thinking, on most days. She looked up from her notebook nearly always. But our eyes never met. That day, almost on cue, she picked up her head when I was walking past. Her brown eyes were glistening, with tears perhaps. I went on my way, as always.
Seeing her by the window was now a routine for me. One that I liked, for reasons unfathomable. It was not that she was beautiful. It was that expression she adorned every time I saw her. It was a familiar look. Despite what I told myself, I knew that look. It was one that I recognised as my own; a river of varied emotions mixed in some cup that was overflowing into that book. Maybe.
Much to my disappointment, that tearful sighting was the last one I had of her. For nearly a week, she was not by her window. I was worried, like I knew her. She had just probably found better things to do. But that didn't stop my worry bubble. Slowly, steadily, I tried to forget her. Soon, I stopped looking out for her. Eventually, I changed my route to work and I no longer passed her house. I got used to another routine. One that didn't involve a face like hers.
Until one day, I saw her again. But not by her window. She was on a cycle and she looked happy. I recognised her instantly. In fairness it is not easy to forget a face like that. I couldn't refrain from smiling at her. It seemed but natural.To my shock, she smiled back. It was a fleeting, hesitant smile but she smiled back. At that moment, that was all that mattered to me.
That was last time I was to see her. Again. I probably never will see her. But I don't regret it. I don't regret the words we never exchanged. I don't regret the relationship we never had. Sometimes I wish I had gone up to her and said all that I wanted to. But I would have come across as a creepy stalker. I wasn't going to risk ruining that wonderful moment we shared. Yes, I was scared of all the possibilities and all the nothing that could have been. Yet, I will always have that moment; one filled with a strange sense of knowing and comfort. Like we had met before, like we knew each other somehow.
I sit by the window as I write this and I think of her fondly. I am willing to accept that some relationships are not vocal or epic love stories or childhood friendships. Some relationships end as quickly as they begin. But they leave you feeling a special kind of feeling that you associate with them. I now believe that she and I had something in common that brought us together for some abstract frame of time. I don't want to make it something it was never. Our relationship, the one that never existed, was never meant to be after all.
"Sienna.. Come down girl," a voice called out in the background. "Coming ma," I replied. I put my pen in my book, left it by the window and went to help my mom. She was just a visitor, passing me by. Thankfully, she smiled before she walked on by.


  1. WOW! Totally loved the play with pronouns and the narrative! Really grew on me and the way it ended just packed such a punch! Typical! I loved this one.

  2. Commendable narration!
    Loved how you ended it. Beautifully written :)

  3. This one was exceptionally good! Loved it! The way u narrated and took it forward was splendid

  4. The description seems almost romantic, as if you were describing a 'love at first sight' kind of feeling.

    Nicely written babe!

  5. Good stuff Nidster! Thought it was a guy all along. You are such a tease. Keep em coming.

  6. @ Paarth :)Thanks you :* :) <3

    @Nostalgic: Way too kind you are :) :) Thanks :)

    @Soumya: Thanks for reading :) :)

    @red: Thank you so much girlie!! :) :)

    @mishi: Thanks love :* :* I was hoping it would be uncliche :)

    @enigmatic Mr. Piichu: Hehe! thanks :) :) <3

  7. Really imaginative & pensive in feeling. Really beautiful.

  8. Loved it! good to see you writing fiction agsin..was an interesting tale well told..ummaah!!

  9. narrated beautifully.... full marks :)

  10. sometimes you just dont know why it is happening, but we simply has to let it happen. it is like finally completing some unfinished business... :)